Like A Tree - Part One

When I read this ....I related.  

Okay....had a little issue with the crone at first but have come to embrace it. 

This tree has caught my eye so many times 

Knarled with age

Still remarkable

 Nourishing other life

                                                          Beautiful in her imperfections

Wonderfully adorned

Winters reveal hardships and age 

                                                                        Perseverance

However

There is majesty

Years have grown  her to greater heights 

She claims her light

The Discarded Soul

The following was written sometime ago

Since this writing I have pursued writing in my own style

through my postings on my blogs.

It was the first day out gardening in the Spring;

I found a discarded sole of a shoe.  

Somehow this sole had found its way into our garden and the thriving weeds that had grown over the winter had surrounded and partially covered, it giving it a nestled sense of belonging.  Significance struck me, but bent on my mission to pull all the weeds and dispose of them in the appropriate "green material" bin which was at hand meant I had to deal with the “un-green”sole later.  There was a fleeting thought, “perhaps it is just where it is supposed to be.” 

I actually forgot about it and so the sole was left a little more exposed as its surroundings had been uprooted with my pulling of the weeds still it remained a barely noticeable part of our spruced up garden.  

The sole, however, was not meant to be forgotten 

because a couple of weeks later I went to go for a walk and discovered somehow the sole had found its way to a very noticeable spot on the adjoining front sidewalk.  Many people walk that sidewalk each day but no one bothered the sole and neither did I other than a fleeting wonder at how it got there and a thought that I suppose I better do something with it.....but later.

There must have been a sublime message. 

I had been praying for direction for some time for a purpose.   Not just anything but something that uses my God given talent.  My problem was I am not sure what my God given talent was.  I have had wondrous ideas but each time I proceeded to go in those directions I become stuck.  I know if it was God given I will not be struggling and trying in my will to make it happen but it will flow out of me with inspired joy.

Each morning I prayed for help and then went about pursuing my ideas expecting God to open doors.  

Each evening I was disappointed and wondered where I had failed. 

I was led to readings that give me wonderful knowledge and insight but no tangible direction.  I could see where God was working in my life and I knew the principles to Let Go and Let God, to live in gratitude, to foster positive attitudes and thoughts and to live each day doing my best to bring love and harmony to the universe.  I live an abundant life materially and for that I am grateful but the void seems to be lack of a purpose or a cause and knowing just what my gift is.

One morning I was contemplating the Lord’s Prayer and in particular the part “Thy Kingdom Come, Thy Will Be Done”.  

I had a realization that I had to meet and be in God’s Presence and 

that meeting had to take place with and in my Soul unencumbered by outside problems and perceptions. 

I had to become reacquainted with my True Self.

Much of my life has been the accumulation of the pursuit of worldly approval, cloaked with posturing and pretense. Let me qualify the word much as this does not encompass all parts of my life; many relationships I have are authentic and I have been and I am truly blessed with much love in my life.  Worldly busyness, problems, obligations and pleasure seeking have distracted me.  Much of my life has been over crammed with doing.  Now my days are slowed and the years behind me are greater than those in front of me. To know my talent and utilize my potential became more pressing.   I filled my days doing mundane chores, or fruitlessly trying to put a framework together for a career project.  To the best of my ability I gladly gave and helped others and I was rewarded by the
enjoyment I received in doing so. Still the angst returned and I spent time reprimanding myself that I should be grateful and I am trying to force solutions: after all perhaps just what I am doing daily was God’s will and perhaps the only problem was my attitude.  The trying to force solutions I admit was true.

 (at that time I did not understand the Law of Resistance to what is, nor the Principle of Surrender)

Since I was a little girl I have unsuccessfully sought God, in churches, in obedience, in achievements, in the Bible, and in other people.  It was an innate urging to connect with something that would surface again and again in my life not allowing me to forget.

I realized that morning  in examining “Thy Will Be Done” I had unknowingly discarded my Soul and it was no wonder I didn’t know God’s will or what my true gift was.  I decided to allow myself the gift of time and commit to making a daily visit to my inner sanctuary. I allowed myself to be free of any preconceived thoughts and simply allow visions to guide me down steps to my inner sanctuary

I went out and took a picture of that discarded sole.  It was still on the sidewalk.  No I did not pick it up and put it in the garbage.  I photographed it and left it. I realized a connection and I knew sometime down the road this would be my story.  

I continued to be still and know God.

I felt some inner stirrings and awakenings.  I felt like I was being led and that indeed God had a purpose for me.  

I went out and retrieved the sole.  The reason?
I felt now there was a story to be shared and a reminder to be had.

On closer examination I realized this was an inner sole .  Dr. Scholl’s actually.  Dr. Scholl was a podiatrist whose fame and fortune came through producing inner soles that gave comfort  and correction to those who were experiencing discomfort in their walk or to break it down further with their steps.

I photographed a closer picture of this inner soul and added my first realizations that morning.  

It was in the midst of  those  wonderful nurturing visits to my inner sanctuary, I found my voice and I wrote my story.

Coinciding with my new found achievement, I received a motivation message via email.  To stop looking outside myself for potential but look at my inner self.  The p.s. at the end of the message brought a smile to my face. It stated:

“The burden of wasted potential is the biggest burden of all!”

................................A few days later....I discovered this in the garden buried in the hedge.

A ballpoint pen

Sticking straight up!!!!!



(since this post I have continued writing not only posts, speeches, letters, texts, meditations, etc....all with the intent to give comfort to those who were experiencing discomfort in their walk)

    

All About Focus Part Two

I was walking the trail having a very passionate heated discussion in my head

with a certain someone

over a situation that was bugging me

Then I saw him

the evasive

Trickster

reminding me

there is often more in the unseen

What may seem Wisdom may be Folly

If a Coyote totem has appeared in your life,
be prepared for "Murphy's Law" to enter your life with a vengeance.
Your sense of humor will arise full force in keeping with the things happening around you.
Blind dates, things that suddenly don't work, all this is Coyote humor.
You need to learn to laugh at yourself and Life's irony.

www.linsdomain.com

I changed my focus

I grabbed my camera

but

he had slunk out of sight before I could catch him

I walked away

Perhaps I could trick him

Camera ready

I did an about face

and returned to the clearing

There he was

out in the open

He quickly trotted for cover

and

turned for one last glance at me

I took one last shot

to my surprise

The camera's focus was different than mine

An unseen bug was revealed

"Blind dates, things that suddenly don't work, all this is Coyote humor.
You need to learn to laugh at yourself and Life's irony"

 Well one thing is certain
this coyote caused me to refocus
The situation bugging me had become blurred

the evasive

Trickster

reminding me

there is often more in the unseen

What may seem Wisdom may be Folly

 

I Hear

At the start of the meeting as is the custom I went to draw a “Well Being” card from the deck.  These cards are from authors, Jerry and Ester Hicks.

The cards were fanned out but one card lay fully exposed. 

My eyes fell upon it – it had the puff ball on it:

-the logo of the book the “Wishing Year”......

                                                            Photo Courtesy of Our Perspective Photography

......that inspired a shift changing weekend; where 6 women dared to journal and write out wishes –seeds put out into the universe to manifest.

                                                  Photos Courtesy of Our Perspective Photography

....seeds that permitted me to become airborne with a decision to let go of something not quite right.

 

 

“Too easy” I thought as I fixated on the card, “I want a surprise.”  “No” a voice corrected, as I reached for another. “This is your card.”....I took the card.

Settled between two Sisters on the couch, one Sister on my left announced that Jerry Hicks had passed away. 

Past experience has shown me when the name, “Gerry” (my late husband) comes up to pay attention.  So it was with curiosity I was listening to my Sister on the left when my Sister on the right of me interjected, “Oh, Ester will miss him so much.” “He was the wind beneath her wings.”

Emotion sprang up and leaked out my eyes.

I was unprepared and I was transported back in time to Gerry’s funeral - a 40 year old widow humbly kneeling in front of a picture of Gerry in front of a filled church; the song, “You Are The Wind Beneath My Wings” speaking the words I wish I had shared earlier.

As I write this I am reminded of words my Sister on my left stated later on in our meeting, “The beauty of death strips away Ego”

How true; , realizations laid bare too late.

Upon hearing the cause of my tears, our Chair Sister calmly welcomed Gerry’s presence.  She then asked me to keep my card for awhile.  

Anger and tolerance had a brief wrestling match.  Did she not know I could outfit a library with the amount of self help books I have read and she thinks hanging onto this puff ball happiness card is something I don’t know?   “Okay, Shirley just keep quiet and don’t make a fuss, breath and go with the flow.” “Trust “was  a small part of her sharing. 

Giving was the larger part.  Our Chair Sister came bearing gifts for all.  My gift came in the form of a book.  She had been at a silent retreat and when her eyes fell upon my gift – an urging voice kept telling her this is for Shirley.   

Trust was supposed to be her lesson to be learned....it became mine and once again I am humbled. Humility and vulnerability continually become my strengths.

I now had two puff balls!

The book’s inscription reads:

Whether you turn to the right or the left,

Your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying,

                             “This is the way; walk in it”

Isaiah 30:21

My loving Giver and Messenger wrote:

As you gave me a book of seeds

So now I give one to you

Be Blessed

Puff Balls – Seeds - Wishes

The Wind Beneath - to carry them

Delivered

Blessings   raining down blooming into Manifestations

I Hear

To view other blogs related to Gerryisms, Puff Balls, God Delivers see labels on orange band move cursor over blank area to illuminate link